Monday, November 15, 2010

who's walking your child down the aisle?

Much of our wedding is a blur to me.  It all happened so fast, and it happened nine years ago.  Everything flew by, except for one moment.  There was one moment when time stopped, and it was  when Sarah stepped to the door and came into view.  There she was, absolutely beautiful – not because she was all done up for our wedding, but because she is - standing with her dad.  The dress did not make her look beautiful; she made the dress worth looking at.

The music changed to Canon in D, and they began walking down the aisle towards me.  As they got closer, I could see that I wasn’t the only one in tears over this moment.  Sarah’s dad had tears streaming down his face: tears of pride, tears of love, and maybe even Tears for Fears.  Our pastor began to talk, and he came around to one of the most important questions of the day: “Who gives this daughter to be married to this man.”  Sarah's dad answered, “Her mother and I.”

I would compare a father walking his daughter down the aisle to parents teaching their children the things of God.  When a person places his faith in Jesus Christ, he becomes a part of a wedding ceremony, where Jesus Christ, the Bridegroom, receives His bride, the church.  Before a bride can marry her groom, she must get down the aisle.  Before a child will accept Jesus as his Savior, he will need to learn about Jesus.  At the end of each action is the moment when someone places the child’s hand into the hand of another.

What earns a person the right to walk a child down the aisle?  Merely being biologically involved in the conception of the child does not qualify a person to take place in a wedding ceremony.  A father – or a grandfather, an uncle, a mentor, etc. – earns his place by being actively involved in his daughter’s life.  He earns it by loving her, by taking part in raising her and teaching her how to be an adult.  It is unfortunate that there are times when a surrogate is required, because the father has chosen to be absent in the raising of his children.  He had his fun and left.  It is sad that another man would have the opportunity to make the most profound masculine impact on another person’s daughter.

It is also sad when a person makes the most profound spiritual impact on someone else’s child.  I pray that as soon as he understands, Jakob will place his faith in Jesus Christ, and I will be certain to be involved in this process.  Sarah and I refuse to allow someone else to be the number one spiritual influence on him.  When he walks the aisle to join Jesus, it will be because we held his hand and led him there.

Do you want your child to find his way down the aisle by himself?  Do you want someone else to have to lead him there?  Or, do you want to do what it takes to be the one to walk your own child down the aisle to meet Jesus?

 

6 comments:

  1. Beautiful post, Jeff. Because of family issues on my daughter-in-law's side, I almost was the one who walked her down the aisle. Instead, she decided to walk by herself. It was a joyful celebration tinged with a sadness.

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  2. [...] This post was mentioned on Twitter by Glynn Young, Jeff Selph. Jeff Selph said: who's walking your child down the aisle?: http://wp.me/pLWlM-dh [...]

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  3. Thank you, Glynn. Sorry there are family issues there. Sounds like she's lucky to have great in-laws, though. Not everyone connects like that. People sometimes think Sarah and I are crazy for how much we like our respective in-laws. I guess it's not normal.

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  4. Excellent! Such a great comparison!

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