just the way she is

I heard this song for the first time this week.  It reminds me of Sarah, and not just because she's the one that showed me the video.  Pretty much every lyric could be said by me to her, but it wouldn't sound as smooth, because I'm not Bruno Mars.  My lacking of singing doesn't diminish her beauty, though.

PSA: It's not just a parking lot

I'm going to go ahead and do a Public Service Announcement today.  You might read it and think it's a rant of sorts, but trust me, it is for your own good and the good of everyone, so it's really more like a PSA.

It is important to remember, when driving through a parking lot, that you should still drive like someone with some sense.  There are usually just as many people in parking lots as there are on roads.  Do you know the difference between the people in parking lots versus people on the road?  In the parking lot, many of them are walking to/from their cars.  They are not protected by big pieces of metal and the airbags within.  You should probably be even more careful when driving near pedestrians.  Don't you think?

This morning, I was walking out of a store and to my car.  The person on my left stopped at the stop sign, because she's smart.  The person to my right wasn't there when I looked the first time.  Then she was, because she blew one stop sign as she was coming around a curve.  I kept walking, because I was already to where she would hit me.  There was no point in stopping in front of her.  I noticed, however, that she was not slowing down.  She was accelerating.  I took it personally at first, but as she drew closer (much, much closer) I saw that she was texting and not even looking up.  She didn't know I was there.  The reason she didn't hit me was not because she looked up, saw me, and avoided me.  The reason I was not hit is because I have cat like speed and reflexes, much like Tommy Boy.  I quickly picked up my speed and avoided being hit by a closer margin than I prefer.  I can't say for sure, because my vision and memory are blurred by anger, annoyance, and relief, but if I had to guess, I would say it was within three feet.  The distance was close enough that had I not run, I wouldn't be typing right now.  I'd be sitting in the ER.

I have noticed that a lot of people do not drive in parking lots like they do on the road.  Most do get slower and more cautious, but there are some that do not.  I see so many people - usually they are very young - who treat a parking lot like a timed obstacle course.  They whip their cars to the right, to the left, weaving back and forth and ignoring traffic signs at high speeds.  I think there is a misconception that driving fast in parking lots makes you cool.  After all, there are more pedestrians to witness how fast you can drive, and that must be cool!  The other thing I see is that a lot of people text while driving in parking lots.  You can't do it on the roads anymore in Michigan (not that you should have been when it wasn't specifically banned), because you might get caught and fined $100, but it's okay to do in parking lots.  Right?  I mean, what can it hurt?  Oh yeah, me and a lot of other people.

They are not just parking lots.  They are more like hug pedestrian crosswalks with a place for you to put your car.  Please don't be stupid while driving through them (or anywhere).  Thank you.

I couldn't let go, and neither can He

One week ago today, Sarah and I stayed at her Aunt Sue’s house, because we wanted to get up at 4:00 AM, as opposed to 3:15 AM.  I was headed to Dallas, but not before I stopped in Baltimore and Atlanta.

Her house is not baby proofed.  So while Sarah was getting ready for bed, I was ruining Jakob’s life.  He was squirming and fighting to get away from me.  Aunt Sue has this awesome fan that we use whenever we stay there, and it is not baby safe.  The cover that goes over the fan has a little bit wider grating on it, so a little guy like Jakob can fit his fingers in there.  That is exactly what he wanted to do, but I could not let him.  I looked him in the eyes, and he looked back at me.  Tears were pouring out of his, and he looked so hurt by my not letting go.

I was getting very upset with his behavior, because it was getting late.  Then I had a great idea: Mickey Mouse Clubhouse.  I have an episode on my computer that I downloaded from iTunes.  I turned it on, and he settled down.  The muscles in his arms and shoulders lost their tension, and he scooted up into my arms.  He laid down right by me with a big grin on his face.

I wasn’t rewarding his defiance, because I did not give him what he wanted.  I did not let him do something that would have hurt him.  But I do love him, and I wanted to give him something to do instead that would benefit him without hurting him.  I held him when he wanted to get away, which made him cry, because I love him.  I held him while he watched Mickey mouse, which made him smile, because I love him.  I held him while he slept – when he didn’t even know I was there caring for him – because I love him.

As I stood and worshipped at the D6 Conference, the words of the song, “You Never Let Go,” started tugging at my heart.  The words, “Oh, no, You never let go, through the calm and through the storm.  Oh, no, You never let go, in every high and every low.  Oh, no, you never let go.  Lord, You never let go of me,” resounded in my heart.  It wasn’t that I was thinking, “Hey, I was a lot like God last night.”  What ran through my head was, “Man, sometimes I’m just like Jakob, and he’s a baby.  But I know better.”

He holds on.  Though I put up a fight sometimes, He holds on tightly to keep me from hurting myself.  Sometimes I cling to Him, and He holds me.  Other times, He holds me and cares for me and protects me from unforeseen harm, and although I don’t always know that He’s working to protect me from this or that, He does it, because He loves me.

He never lets go, no matter what.  He never lets go, because He loves me.  I love You, too.

Pranked #1 - what I feel is more valid than the Bible

We started talking about pranks the Devil pulls last night.  The first one we covered was the idea that what we feel is somehow more valid and supersedes what the Bible says.  It's a prevalent notion.  I've heard it a lot.  I've had times where I questioned what was right, because my emotions got in the way, or at the very least, I allowed my emotions (mostly anger) to lead me to knowingly sin, but I justified it with circumstances.  I think I'll just post the slides, because those cover much of my lesson.

if looks were everything...

...Jakob would be your once and future king.

Exactly one year ago, at the same time this post is being published, the world was made better by the birth of Jakob Israel Selph.  I still remember meeting him for the first time.  I remember holding him for the first time, the first time I fed him, the day we brought him home, and so many other moments.  I cannot tell you all of them, although you've probably heard many of them if you follow me on twitter or facebook.

Sarah and I love Jakob.  We love him like I never knew we could, in a way we never understood before now.  Every time he does something new, we are so proud of him, and every time he shows blatant defiance, we forgive and continue to love him.  Knowing that God is a better Dad than me, and knowing how much I love and care for Jakob, I feel pretty good about my own future.

Happy birthday, Bubs.  Thank you for the best year of our lives.  We love you.

back to school tips

Today is the day that many of the kids from our church go back to school.  Some have been bored since the second week of Summer vacation and are ready to go back.  Others have fully enjoyed their break and will be bored in about two hours.  Some people love school, and some people love staying home (some are home schooled and get to enjoy both).  I stopped enjoying school sometime during the 7th grade, so I do not envy the students.  I disliked it from that time all the way through completing my Bachelor's degree, and that's not because I struggle in school.  I do well, but I do not enjoy everything I am good at (i.e. sales).  Although I don't enjoy school, I plan to return myself in October.  The only positive party of my schooling will be that I'm going to be doing correspondence courses only, which means I will operate on my own schedule and work in my pajamas.  I guess working from home also means I don't need the handy tips provided in this handy tutorial:



Hopefully you will follow this timely advice.  Of course, you cannot set your outfit out the night before, because that was last night.  I'm sorry for my tardiness.  Two more tardies, and I'm off to detention.  Yikes.

Maybe you're not looking forward to school today.  Well, I have something for you to look forward to tonight: the Mickey Mouse Clubhouse special, Road Rally, is on tonight at 7 PM.  What could make you feel better than that?

Good luck to all of you students and parents today!

a good ending to a scary story

Sarah, Jakob, and I went to Florida for vacation a few weeks ago.  The week started out great with a stellar car-riding performance by Jakob on our way down, and the good times continued on right through the week.  The ride home, however, was not so great.  I don't blame Jakob, who increased his fuss time by 40 minutes or so, because really, less than one hour of fussing during a combined 42 hours of time in the car is amazing.  I blame the bad drive home on what happened just south of Atlanta.

I was driving on I-75 North, half an hour south of Atlanta.  Sarah was asleep in the passenger seat, and Jakob was snoozing in his car seat.  There were four lanes on my side of the highway, and I was in the second lane from the left.  I was aggravated for a couple of miles, because a lady in a Kia Sorrento tailgated closely enough that I could see the annoyed look she had on her face.  I've never liked being tailgated, and I appreciate it much less so now that I have the greatest child ever in the backseat.  Now, having a bit of the ADD, my eyes are always bouncing when I'm driving: front, side mirrors, rear view mirror, repeat, over and over and over.  Where it may inhibit me in other settings, my active eyes and mind help me see a lot on the road.

I was mildly amused, as my eyes bounced back-and-forth, that there were cars shooting past us on both sides.  There really wasn't anywhere for the annoying lady to go, so her trip would just be impeded by what she viewed as my ridiculously slow speed.  She, too, was diligently checking her mirrors, sighing in frustration, and hitting her steering wheel.  I made her day.  I saw a white BMW coming up on our right; she did not.  She started to merge into the lane next to us, and the BMW driver had to slam on her brakes.  That is not the only thing she had to do to avoid hitting the lady in the Kia.  She also had to switch lanes, to the far right lane, but there was a semi going slower than everyone else around in that lane.  She only had one choice to avoid impact: go off the road.  So off the road she went.  I saw her hit the grass going pretty fast, and then the car disappeared from sight, because there was some sort of drop off.  Between me and the BMW at the time is this Kia.  I saw the BMW go down, and I looked right at the driver of the Kia, whose mouth was agape.  She slammed on her brakes.  There was indecision on her face.  Then she made up her mind: she floored it.

A semi and a pick up truck both immediately pulled over the check on the driver of the BMW.  I couldn't get there without causing my own accident, so I did something else.  I called 911 and went after the Kia.  The lady got off at the next exit, and I momentarily thought she was pulling off to recover and maybe call 911 herself, but she had no such scruples.  Instead, she made a left turn, followed by a quick right onto a road that ran parallel to I-75 at about 60 MPH.  She was a crafty one, but since I don't think she knew I was following her, she wasn't crafty enough.  I lost connection with the 911 operators 3 different times, but I kept calling back, giving them updates on where we were.  We drove for ten minutes before a police officer finally spotted us and came out after her.  He was a Lamar Country Sheriff.  He first went and talked to the driver of the Kia, and then he came back to me.  I was instructed by the operators to stay by the cop car in case he had questions.  He came back and told me that the incident had taken place in Monroe County, so he was not able to do anything.  He did assure me, however, that he would talk to her about being more careful.

I was very upset the rest of the car ride home, which had about fifteen hours left in it.  I was upset, because I thought the person in the BMW could have been seriously injured or dead.  I was upset, because I felt like the lady that ran the person off the road took off, was caught, and merely given a stern talking to.  I was also upset, because I felt like the police wasted thirty minutes of my time by letting her go.  I was mostly upset, because I was thinking about how no matter how safely I drove, Sarah and Jakob were still vulnerable, because I can't control the idiocy of others.  I have been bothered on and off about this for the last two weeks.  I have thought about it, dreamed about, and prayed about it.

Yesterday afternoon, I received a voice mail from a man in Georgia.  He got my name and phone number from the 911 call.  He started out by giving his name, telling me how he got my information, and telling me that his daughter was the driver of the BMW.  My stomach immediately turned over.  He didn't sound too old, so if his daughter was driving, my mind immediately decided she would be an older teenager.  I was relieved, however, by the statement immediately following: "...that was my BMW, and my daughter was driving.  She's okay.  She wasn't hurt."  What a relief!  He needed to talk to me about his insurance company, who needs to speak with me about what happened.  I can rest more easily tonight, because I know the person who I thought was seriously hurt or possibly dead is, in fact, just fine.  And although I'd been pretty aggravated for having felt my time was wasted that day, it turns out it was not.  My testimony to the insurance company will help out the family that owns the BMW.  Without it, the insurance company may not have covered the cost of fixing the car.  So the guy I spoke with today was extremely grateful for what he viewed as my selfless pursuit of justice.  I'm still not sure if it was selfless or selfish anger over what could have happened to us.  Either way, it all worked out, and the ending was much greater than the lead-in.

baggage wrap up

Chris Johnson taught youth group for the first time Sunday night.  That just gets me all fired up.  I'm not really the leader who wants to do everything.  I receive a lot of joy seeing my leaders excel as they stretch themselves and take on new things.  So Sunday night was big for me.  I loved it, and he really did a great job.

After Chris' lesson, I gave a mini lesson, as well.  It wasn't to reinforce his lesson, for it stood on its own, but rather to wrap up the series that we'd been working through for the Summer.  We finished Baggage by letting ours go with a cool little ceremony.  Below, you can watch Chris' lesson and our baggage releasing.

[vimeo http://vimeo.com/14589282]

[vimeo http://vimeo.com/14585821]