Thursday, November 12, 2009

who's arm will you write on?


I am happy to introduce my guest blogger today. She is my wife and my best friend. Here name is Sarah. We've been married for just over 8 years. I asked her to write today, because today is To Write Love on Her Arms Day, and she understands why this day is so important. So without any further jibba jabba on my part, I introduce my beautiful wife's blog post:



**I wanted to add this note, for anyone who thinks this couldn't possibly be a problem with people in their family. My wife was raised in a good, Christian home, with parents, grandparents, and an Aunt Sue that loved her. This isn't a problem just for the unsaved, the broken homes, and the unloved. Welcome to a fallen world. Enjoy your stay.**
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wiktionary
defines depression as a state of mind producing serious, long-term lowering of enjoyment of life, or a period of unhappiness or low morale which lasts longer than several weeks and may include ideation of self-inflicted [hey, that's the name of this blog!] injury or suicide.
it's actually harder than it sounds.
when i was a junior in high school, i was depressed. so i can tell you that it's not just a made up condition that sad people use as a cop out.
i can't tell you what triggered it, but i can tell you that God saved me from it. some people use anti-depressants, some people just don't ever get over it. in my case, i'm not depressed anymore, but the devil knows it's an easy in with me, and he still tempts me with it. boo on him, though, God's given me victory over it.
it was the hardest thing i've ever been through. harder than temporarily losing the lower half of my body in our car accident, because when i was depressed, i was not walking with God. every symptom you hear on those anti-depressant commercials is true. i had a lack of interest in people, in school, and i had a hard time concentrating at school and at work. i had a total feeling of loneliness and hopelessness. i had no hope for the future, and i felt like the only relief i could get was death - suicide was something that i had seriously contemplated, and almost attempted. any consolation from my friends or family was futile, because to a depressed person, it just doesn't matter. not because i didn't appreciate it, but because depression is an all-encompassing state of mind. a friend of mine anonymously reported me to our school counselor because she noticed i was different and distant, and she was concerned. depressed people also don't like to talk about their depression. my counselor asked me how i felt, if i wanted to die.... i, of course, was not up for discussing it. i told her that i did want to die, but i did not tell her why because i did not know why. i just knew i was sad when i woke up in the morning, sad throughout the day, sad when i'd cry myself to sleep every night.
a friend asked me how i got over the depression. and i honestly don't remember. at one point between my junior and senior year, i decided to walk with God again. of course, it wasn't something that happened overnight, but God seamlessly brought me out of my depression and healed my heart.
i do still struggle with depression sometimes. sometimes i feel sad without knowing why. but unlike before, it doesn't last.
happy To Write Love On Her Arms Day. a huge thanks to this organization for helping people through their depression, addiction and self-injury.
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I just wish I knew her back then and could have had a part in writing love on her arm. Who do you know that needs this? Will you write it?

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